You know those sprays people buy to mask the orders left when they take a shit? They’re worse than the shit, and I mean way worse. I was, for the most part, indifferent about the usage of such sprays until I worked with someone who would flood the restroom with the foul stench every time they took a shit. They’d walk by me afterwards, and the cloud of toxic fumes would engulf me and chock my lungs until I’m crawling on the ground pleading for a gas mask from the BDSM coworker on the other side of the room. I’d always feel like I’d prefer the gas chamber to such foul stenches, then I thought about it a little. There’s nothing different twixt a gas chamber and the suffering I was being put through. Perhaps the difference was I was suffering instead of dying.
Why can’t the fucking manufacturing companies produce a product that kills the smell, and not cover it up with something even worse? How difficult is it to produce an alcohol that absorbs organic particles in the air, dissolves them to separate the odors as the mist falls to the ground, and then evaporates away? They produce the strongest odors known to man… ok… that title goes to a friend of mine, but that’s another story. What these smells in a can do is act as an ungodly repellant. If I get near a restroom and I am overwhelmed with toxic fumes from these sprays, then I’m going elsewhere. I’d rather suffer through five hundred yards of shit-smelling foulness I can’t even imagine.
When sprayers leave the room they sprayed, they’re unaware of the cologne and perfume they just put on themselves. It’s not something that’s nice to smell by any stretch of the imagination. It’s bad enough that fecal particles get attached to you and linger around causing that smell, but it dissipates relatively quickly. The scented sprays on the other hand are designed to last a long time, and they stick to you just as long as they’re supposed to. So instead of annoying someone for a couple minutes, you force a chemical containment and cleanup crew to be summoned with every puff of the spray.
For those of you who think you must use these sprays, don’t spray in the room until you can smell it. You’re already suffering from hyposmia because you’re sitting on top of your own shit, and spraying until you can smell the sweet wonderful nectar of the flowers overloads everyone else who still has their sense of smell intact. Don’t spray like you’re trying to disinfect a sewage plant. Don’t spray like you’re killing bugs. You know what? Don’t fucking use the spray at all. Turn on the vent, and close the door. If the room has an outside window, open that, but don’t make the problem worse by pretending to cover it up. Everybody shits, and all shit smells. Wrapping shit in a pretty bow doesn’t make it any less smelly shit; it makes it smelly shit with a dirty bow.